I Wish To Die Another Day... Part I

There was once a man who lived somewhere on the face of earth and who had a very strong desire to meet God at least once in his lifetime. Now this man had everything to lead a happy life- a job that had respect, money that was substantial, a newly wedded wife, siblings that he loved and who loved him back, parents who still pampered him with goodies, friends who could die for him, boss who was closer than a friend, a house that could be said a miniature mansion and whatever else you could think of.

But still he wasn't happy the effect to which he should have been. His friends would often call him 'Mr. You've-got-everything' or 'Mr. Luckiest' but he would ward them off saying 'of what use is all this, if I don't know whether I shall survive long enough to relish them'. Not even once could his friends make out his logic. They would only feel that 'a person who doesn't acknowledge is a person who doesn't deserve'.

One night when our man was fast asleep, he dreamt having gone to God's abode. He requested the sentry at Heaven's gate to allow him to meet God because "no other soul on earth has ever been so compulsive to meet Him". The sentry allowed him after mentioning the do's and dont's followed inside the premises. The man walked and walked far into God's abode anticipating to see the Father of Heaven at any moment. Having walked several miles into the place that was immaculately white, he finally beheld steps that went up to an exquisite throne and was supposed to be God's seat. Angels surrounded the throne in perfect harmony and our man knew that God had to be there.

Before he could think of climbing the first step, he heard a voice that echoed far and wide. "Stay where you are son. These steps mark the minimum distance between mankind and Me. No one can tread upon them". The voice was God's. The man, having finally realized his God, stepped back and looked earnestly into the mist that surrounded the throne. And moments later, he saw a figure taking shape. There was God himself in His supreme being sitting in front of the man. He smiled at the human evidently congratulating him for having come this far with his determination. Meanwhile our mortal human stared at Him awe-struck. Soon God said "Son, you don't have enough time here. If you keep on staring at my immortal being like this, years will pass on Earth and when you go back you shall witness a different era with nothing that you ever witnessed, present around you. So say what you have to say, ask for more luxuries if you need, and then go back to where you belong".

This broke the man's silence. He knew he couldn't stay there till eternity. So finally he spoke- "Oh mighty Father, oh Almighty that dwells in heaven, oh Creator of everything that has ever existed in this universe and beyond, I just want to know the date when I shall die. That's all I wish to ask you". God was surprised. He was amazed that one human that he sculptured could come to Him one day and make such a wish. He asked "Why do you wish to know the date of your death? Don't you know death never comes informed?" to which the man replied "Oh Holy Sire, I know this is a strange wish but I request you to bestow this knowledge onto me. You have given me every comfort in life. But what if I die tomorrow? Without having enjoyed all that you have put in my basket? Oh Master of Earth, Hell and Heaven, I need to know what time I have in my hands so that, I can put your gifts to the best possible use and enjoy my stay on the planet". So God understood his logic now. He smirked at Himself for having made such a creature. Nevertheless, the man standing at the foot of the stairs was His child and it was His duty to grant him something that he so keenly wanted. So He said "So be it my child. Go back to your dwelling. When you shall wake up the next morning, a date will flash across your mind as the first thought of the day and that, will be the day of your death. You have my blessings son". And then there was a thick mist all around. The next moment the man found himself draped in white linen up till his face having woken up from his deep slumber.

******************************************************************************

Our protagonist got up and sat straight. There were droplets of sweat on his forehead. He definitely had a very deep sleep. The insides of his head ached. May be because he had an intensified dream. But before he could reckon what had happened in his dream the previous night, suddenly a date 'flashed across' his mind. It happened suddenly. It surprised him to be remembering a future date the moment he got up from his sleep. It didn’t make any sense to him- nothing at all. Seconds later, the man was pondering on the date. The date was someday forty-five years later- forty-five years! The world might as well end within that period. There might be another world war that would be ninety per cent nuclear; there might be extensive meltdown of polar glaciers causing global havoc; there might be tsunamis that would wipe out the earth of its living matter. No one knows what is going to happen the next second. So, of what significance is a date so future in time and why did it have to come to his mind now? Our man thought impatiently, trying to recall if this had anything to do with his slumber. The more he brooded, the more impatient he became.

But soon enough, the light dawned upon him. He could finally remember his dream and the incidents that had taken place. He could finally imbibe the metaphorical significance of the date. 'The world will be good for at least another forty-five years'- he said to himself. Because he knew what the date meant. He knew why he had a mysterious smile on his face now. He knew he had no dream last night. He had done what no other mortal had ever done or could ever do. He met God in his dreams and as it turned out, it was a real meeting. He was glad now. He was, in fact, very happy. His perseverance had paid off. Now his life had a meaning. He got what he wanted. He met God and came back to earth fully alive and he even got what he wished. It was a date that he wanted God to reveal. And now he knew it- the day he would die.

So over the next few weeks, the man was very happy with himself and his life. Now he enjoyed his luxuries; he loved his dear ones all the more; he allowed his parents to pamper him; he smiled with content when his friends called him the luckiest and he made sure his wife also felt she was the luckiest woman on earth. He would wake up smiling every morning saying to himself, 'I don’t have time to frown at the world. I just don’t have the time to feel the weight of the world. Be happy and make others happy'. He would take risks only to prove to his own self that he couldn’t die sooner than the date he knew. In the initial days of his revelation, he was both apprehensive and passionate when he did things that involved a lot of risk. Apprehensive, because he doubted his survival in the most obvious attempts of suicide. Passionate, because each attempt that he took, strongly reassured the thing that he had been enlightened of, thereby renewing his vigour for the next try.

The very second day after that dream, the man bought a bottle of poison and poured its contents down his throat. That was his first test to check the legitimacy of the date. Nothing happened. The contents passed out in his urine just the way they had entered his body. The man was amazed. He thought the miracle happened because he did the act in secret. So the next time, he informed his friends that he is planning to jump off a high cliff. He was sure he couldn’t just stay afloat on air just like that. He assumed that he might sustain serious injuries but wouldn’t die. A hundred people gathered in awe to watch the man’s dare devilry. People talked and gossiped about him. They even pitied his decision as they believed he would die soon leaving everything behind. But the moment he tried risking it, local cops arrived and took him in custody. However he tried, they didn’t release him as it was considered illegal on the part of a citizen to attempt something like that, which had the sure outcome of death, unless the concerned person showed evidence of proper arrangements taken to prevent a likely death. Poor soul, he couldn’t let them know of his bargain with God. And even if he had, he would have managed nothing more than scorn in everyone’s eyes.

Days rolled by and our man was seen with absolutely no worries. He wouldn't worry about his prosperity, he wouldn't worry about his occupation and he wouldn't worry about the next future second because all he knew was that whatever he did, however he did he would just not die before 'that day'.

Now our man drove his car at top speed even in crowded areas. He never worried about an accident. It had been long since he had had a physical injury. It seemed to him that apart from revealing the date of his death, God had also bestowed upon him the boon of not getting hurt. Some or the other phenomenon would happen every time he went close to hurting himself and he would miraculously escape the idea. People on the road would magically give him way every time he gave a throttle on his accelerator. No one ever got hurt in his experiments and least of all, he himself. From petty risks- cutting vegetables with eyes closed to moderate risks-handling electrical equipment with wet hands to severe ones-trying to drown himself in a river, he never succeeded in any of his ventures. As he had observed in every case, some miracle would happen without fail before he experienced even the slightest agony. As months passed, he realized that all the minor injuries he had suffered during this whole time were those that happened accidentally- without any of his deliberate-death-causing strategies involved.

Meanwhile, he prospered a great deal in his work. His fame increased each day as being the most industrious person in the department. He now worked with a fearless attitude and it yielded amazing results on every occasion. His wealth increased substantially now; his property grew several fold; his children gloated of their father's immense success and dare-devilry; his wife could now be seen wearing the best of jewels; the man also had time now for his friends; they partied on weekends; our man became more charitable- his donations doubled and then trebled; All that he had ever wished for had now come true for him. But after all this, was he happy?

No he was not.